Lynda Joy Young (21 Sep 1949 - 11 Nov 2021)

FROM TOLLESHUNT D'ARCY VILLAGE HALL MANAGEMENT COMMITTEE -
REMEMBERING LYNDA FOR ALL HER STERLING WORK ON OUR FUND RAISING COMMITTEE FOR A NEW VILLAGE HALL. IT WAS HER IDEA TO HOLD A RACE NIGHT WHICH SHE ORGANIZED FOR US AND WHICH WAS A GREAT SUCCESS. SHE WILL BE IN OUR THOUGHTS WHEN WE HOLD RACE NIGHTS IN THE FUTURE. LYNDA WILL BE SADLY MISSED BY US ALL.

For those who couldn't make the funeral on Friday, I've included Mum's eulogy, read so lovingly by her daughter in law, Tasha, below:

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We all hope to have a mother-in-law who is sincere and thoughtful. Lynda welcomed me into her family with open arms. She never forgot a birthday or anniversary and often hand-crafted cards and gifts for them from her office which was an Aladdin’s cave of crafting materials. She had so much love for everyone. I felt part of the family right from the very beginning.

Perhaps that was Lynda’s defining characteristic: she was driven to help other people, including strangers, and this kept her busy for her entire life. Amongst Lynda’s many voluntary activities, several stand out:

• the four children she lovingly raised, Claire, Paul, Robin and Christopher, all of whom were born within a 4 year period and the 6 grandchildren (Holly, Oliver, Amelia, Benjamin, Jack and William) she adored. Family meant a huge amount to Lynda and we all have fond memories of getting together for lunch or birthdays which were always happy times with lots of laughter, even if Lynda was quite often the butt of the jokes!

• Not many people would want their mother living on their doorstep, but it is a testament to the love within the family that Claire and Carl made it possible for Lynda and Terry to build their dream retirement home on the plot next to their own home. It also meant that Lynda finally found the drinking partner she had hoped for in Carl, her son in law.

• The latest whole family get together was for her 72nd birthday just 2 months ago, where the grandkids running riot together only paused to watch in awe as the Hungry Caterpillar cake that Lynda had requested specially was presented on the “singing” cake stand that Lynda had used for her own children’s birthdays 40 odd years earlier.

• Lynda also spent countless evenings and weekends in ice rinks dotted around the country as her two youngest sons and daughter played ice hockey during their teens. Lynda helped to keep some of those teams running by acting as treasurer and undertaking fundraising activities and several trips aboard.

One memorable trip was with the Chelmsford under 16s team to Finland over New Year for a tournament. The temperature dropped as low as minus 30 degrees Celsius and Lynda, Terry, Robin and Christopher stood on a frozen lake as the turn of the New Year came around, whilst the crowd of locals, including the mayor, set off fireworks and aimed them at passing vehicles!

• Lynda also spent over 30 years and what must be over a thousand trials as a magistrate sitting in Southend and Basildon magistrates court, acting as chairperson in many of them. She especially liked working in the Youth Court, where she felt she made a difference to the lives of young offenders.

• I suspect not many people know this, but Lynda also donated blood every 6 weeks from when she was 18 to when she was forced to stop at age 54 after a blood transfusion. In total Lynda donated over 100 times and even made many special trips to the Brentwood Blood Donation Centre to donate platelets.
Lynda was also a dedicated and lifelong Towns Women’s Guild member, rising from ordinary member of her local Guild to being a board member trustee on the national executive board of the charity.

Lynda loved to chat and was often one of the last members to leave a meeting and took great enjoyment from singing in the Towns Women’s choir.

It also gave Lynda some comfort in her last weeks to learn that despite her cancer and advancing years, she would still be able to follow in her youngest son Christopher’s footsteps and donate some of her body tissues so that someone could benefit from her body after she passed.

Lynda’s selfless giving of her time and love did come with some drawbacks though – punctuality certain wasn’t one of her strengths, despite setting her clocks an hour and 10 minutes fast!

Indeed every one of her family members has many stories of arranging to meet her at a certain time, only to be still standing there an hour or more later waiting for her to arrive.

Lynda could never see the issue with this – there had always been a good reason, like “there was a big queue in the shop”, or “the place she was visiting was a long way from the meeting point”!

Personally, it never really bothered me – it just gave me more shopping time!
Lynda loved plants and gardening, but unfortunately did not have green fingers. Terry used to say that you could hear the knell of the death bell tolling whenever a new plant was brought into the house!

Lynda also loved to travel and visited countries all across the world. Her last visit was to Egypt just before the first Covid lockdown, where she took her mobility scooter up to the top of Queen Hat-shup-soot’s tomb. That was quite a climb for both her and the scooter!

Lynda didn’t really get on with technology, especially zoom calls on her ipad. You could never reach her on her mobile phone, it was always either out of battery, switched off or left somewhere out of reach. She never even learned to ride a bike and her car can attest to countless scrapes and dents from misjudged parking manoeuvres!

One particular time, Lynda locked her car keys in the boot of her car at the local supermarket. She called Robin to fetch her other set of keys from home and bring them to her. As soon as she got the new set of keys and opened the boot, she placed the new set of keys next to the first set on the floor of the boot whilst she finished unpacking, seemingly completely unaware that this was how she’d locked the first set of keys in the boot!

Perhaps no-one knew Lynda better than Terry, my father in law. Lynda and Terry first met when they were 16 in 1965. Terry was in his first year of studying for his A-levels at the Boys School in East Ham and Lynda was in her O-Level year at the Girl’s school. The two of them attended the school dance and Terry’s opening line, which Lynda still lightly jibed Terry for in her final days, was to ask if he could “sit out the next dance with her”.

The following day Terry took her to watch West Ham play at Upton Park and in the evening he borrowed 10 Bob from his Dad to take her to the cinema. That was the start of a lifelong and loving relationship.

They were married in 1969 in the summer before Lynda’s 20th birthday and they recently celebrated their 50th wedding anniversary in the summer of 2019.
Terry’s love for Lynda was clear for all to see in how he looked after her in the final months of her life. Lynda mentioned several times how she was getting annoyed with him continuously making a fuss of her.

I’m sure I speak for everyone here today when I say that we all loved her dearly, she was a truly unique person.

My son Jack keeps saying that she’s sitting on a star, which I think is very fitting. Lynda was a true star of a mother in law, a mother, wife, grandmother, friend, colleague and just a lovely person with a beautiful soul. We couldn’t have wished for better.

Thank you all for coming to celebrate her life today.

In memory of our deadly loved fiend
You will always have a special place in our hearts
Pat and Dennis

In memory of Lynda.
Rest in Peace.

God Bless

In memory of Lynda, it was a pleasure to have known her.

I hope all your lovely happy memories give you all comfort on your terrible loss.

You will be greatly missed

Lynda has left a hole in family and friends life’s and she will be missed by everyone. We had the pleasure of knowing Lynda as neighbours whilst living in Hockley, which turned into very special friends over 25 years. Much love Sandra, Michael, Lewis & Laura xxxx

I'm sitting here wondering how to sum up 42 years of having a wonderful mum in just a few short paragraphs and I know there's no way I can do her justice. She was simply a brilliant mum to all four of her kids and was a thoughtful and loving grandma to her 6 grandchildren.

I will never forget the lengths mum would go to for her children and friends. I remember her taking me to the dark, damp and cold Romford ice rinks for countless training sessions several times a week over the winter months that didn't even start until 10.15 pm, we would not leave until after midnight to go home until after midnight. There was even a time when all 5'1" of mum tried to personally defend her 6ft, 20-year-old son, in a hockey game from one of the other team's older and more physical players!

Mum spent her entire life trying to help other people. As kids, we would get fed up with the seemingly constant trips to the blood donation centre or recycling bins, but for mum, this was second nature, she was in a position to look after other people and so she did, with no complaints or fuss.

Mum was always at the heart of our family, never forgetting to call us all regularly - in recent years I would quite often catch up on what my brothers and sister were up to from talking to my mum each weekend. Mum was always keen for the family to get together and enjoyed hosting her wider family and friends on special occasions.

And mum was constantly busy, she often joked that she was busier in her retirement than she was as a mum and working.

Even at the end, mum was keen to have her family around her and I'm glad she was able to pass as she wanted: at home, in the house Terry and mum had built for their retirement, surrounded by her loved ones, overlooking the fields of Tolleshunt D'Arcy.

We will miss you dearly mum, but hopefully you are now free from any pain and are running around up there with Christopher and all our other loved ones laughing as we always did when we got together. Perhaps you'll even find the time to learn how to ride a bike?

In memory of dear Lynda. May she rest in peace. x

With fond memories of a dear friend x

It's hard to come to terms with the passing of someone that you have known your whole life. Not so much in recent times, but as a kid our family and Lynda's spent a great deal of time together, especially for Sunday outings, holidays and at Christmas.

There were times when my lovely cousin seemed more like a big sister. I doubt she realised the lasting impact she would have on me. As a teenager, she was the first real music fan I knew. Not just liking music, but having a seriously good record collection made up of the latest singles and albums. It was Lynda that introduced me to, for example, Beatles and Rolling Stones tracks I might not otherwise have come across. Even now, my passion for music often keeps me up listening into the wee small hours!

Also, my lifelong love affair with West Ham United is in no small part due to Lynda and her parents. In 1964 I remember walking from their house in Forest Gate to see the West Ham team bus slowly make its way down a packed Barking Road with the newly acquired FA Cup. I had flirted with the idea of following Spurs until then. That went straight out of the window!

On another occasion, Lynda and Terry took me to my first away match v Coventry. I had a great time and the icing on the cake was stopping at a pub on the way home for a drink and a game of darts, even though I was only about 15. Brilliant!

Terry, I'm so pleased that the most recent times we've met up were all for noteworthy celebrations, both at our place and yours. Happy Days!

Sending much love from Gordon, Carol, Aunt Joan and Family at this very sad time.