Ruth Mary Fulford (6 Apr 1955 - 22 Mar 2017)

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Funeral Service

Location
WILFORD HILL CREMATORIUM LOUGHBOROUGH ROAD WEST BRIDGFORD, NOTTINGHAM NG2 7FE
Date
7th Apr 2017
Time
2.40pm
Funeral Director
A.W. Lymn West Bridgford

Funeral Reception

Location
Private WakeNG2
Date
TBC
Time
TBC

In loving memory of Ruth Mary Fulford who sadly passed away on 22nd March 2017.

The funeral will be a celebration of Ruth's life so please dress to impress, gloomy black attire is not required!

Wake will be held privately for friends and family.

Thank you

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Ruth - by Helen Parkes (née Miles)

Some of my much loved childhood memories are inextricably linked to you. Chilly bonfire nights, wrapped up in thick coats and scratchy woollen scarves and gloves, the sweet smell of bonfire toffee mingled with roasting chestnuts and eyes full of wonder, bright with fireworks sparkling in the dark night sky.

Long summer days, playing happily, exploring your fairytale like garden, soaking up the longed for sunny rays. Packing up picnics for afternoons in The Park; heat –haze rising from the pathways, darting in and out of the metal railings and running around playing tag on the parched grass and dusty earth.

An All Hallows evening where you alighted the stage. On those evenings I observed everything in you I didn’t feel in myself; brave, confident outgoing and radiant. Selflessly giving your time to the juniors. With your kind, supportive, thoughtful, creative and inspiring ways you sort to make us exactly how I saw you.

A home from home, I remember the warmth of walking in the door. The creak of the floorboards on the bathroom step. Longing for a bedroom like your attic room. And the wonder of just how many clothes and jewellery a person could own. With an open door we were always welcome in your heart, garden & home..... ....except for those fifteen minutes every day when the “ do,do,do,do,do,do,do” of the radio would announce the start of The Archers. The metaphorical “ do not disturb” sign went up on the kitchen door and we respected that it was, for a small portion of the day, your time for you and our time to amuse ourselves for a change.

Thank you for these (and many more) precious memories and feelings from my childhood that I will always hold in my heart.
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A Moment In Time - A memory of Ruth from John Glynn:

Nottingham, Saturday 27th May 1972; there's a party to go that evening in Scarborough to celebrate Sue Middlemiss' 21st birthday. I drive round to 10 Devonshire Road, West Bridgford just after midday to pick up my friend Nick Kennedy from his family home; the plan is to then collect another friend Paul Smith from Nottingham railway station and for the three of us to drive to Scarborough for the party. Paul is arriving from Reading University. Fortunately for me, Paul is late, very late, having decided to play rugby before setting off. Nick and I thus spend all afternoon sitting in the back garden at Devonshire Road waiting. It's a beautiful sunny day. The Kennedys have recently acquired the LP album 'Blue' by Joni Mitchell and Nick's second sister Ruth, then a beautiful teenager, plays us that album over and over again. That lovely afternoon is still clear in my mind nearly 45 years later. Over the years on many a sunny day, I have opened our back windows, sat in the garden and listened to the songs of that selfsame album. In my mind I see and hear the beautiful young Ruth extolling the music of that magical afternoon in 1972.

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A card to us from Ruth's friend Karen:

To Royston, Tansin, Fred and David,

I'm sorry this isn't a conventional card for the occasion but they all made me so sad. This card was the closest I could find that made me think of Ruth.

My beautiful friend who had the biggest heart, and gave everyone so much time and energy, making us all feel so special. Ruth never knew how beautiful she was, and would never believe me when I told her. I only hope she had some idea of the enormous amount of love there was surrounding her.

I keep remembering the variety of fun days we had. Testing recipes when Fred became vegetarian. Days in Derbyshire looking for baby lambs too coo over, walking Louis to Holme Pierrepont, we had a special table at the top of the hill where we would barbeque lamb chops (not the ones from Derbyshire), lots of nights at the theatre and lots more eating and drinking. And then I think of all the wonderful things she did. Taking me to the children’s petting farm so I could hold the baby goats, pigs, hamsters and so much more. And of course there were my amazing birthday lunches she would host and cook for me, with personalised birthday cards. One from the Three Stags Head, Royston had to be chief photographer on that day so I hope the beer was good. Last year my card was fluffy sheep I guess Tansin probably had to assist in making that one.

Ruth invited me to your home for Christmas, I wasn’t coming, I was in too much of a tizzy, but I did come. Low and behold what a wonderful joyous day I had with you all. I also discovered children aren’t scary, well, not when it’s the light of Ruth’s life Charlie. Thanks again for the crown Charlie.

Thank you for sharing Ruth with me and letting me into your lovely family.

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Jo West lit a candle
Linda Neve donated £100 in memory of Ruth
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Mike & Cath Rivett donated £25 in memory of Ruth
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Offline donation: Jennifer & Robert Hardy donated in memory of Ruth
karen stanley donated £10 in memory of Ruth
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Carly Price donated £10 in memory of Ruth

Ruth, you were the best cheerleader I've ever met, so supportive and encouraging, I bet there is a whole mass of people naming you somewhere near the top of the list of people who contributed the most to the person they have become today, I know you are definitely on my list.
I can't remember the first time I met you, I was under five, but you and Tansin are in a lot of photos and even more memories! You were the coolest mum of all my friends and was always ready and willing with advice, a cuddle, or in later years, a snowball!
You encouraged me on stage with All Hallows', and backstage, and it's thanks to you I have a lifelong love of musical theatre and am still involved in it. Never found another group like it, you made the teenage years so special, and even when Tansin and I grew apart you were still the same warm, hilarious inspiration you always had been to me.
Rest well wonderful Ruth, with much love x

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Richard Miles donated £50 in memory of Ruth
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Richard Lake donated £5 in memory of Ruth
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Tom Porter donated £5 in memory of Ruth

Condolences Rich. What a lovely, honourable cause! Tom P x

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Frederick Fulford wrote

Ruth.
To my dad Roy, Ruth was the stunning, adventurous, confident woman who stole his heart as a young man in the Test Match Inn and opened up the world for him, grabbing life by the hand and running with it, and taking him along for the ride. To her sister Ann she was an inspiration, bold and brave; and to her niece Helen, Ruth embodied the confidence and radiance to which she aspired. Each of you will hold on to different, memories, different qualities of Ruth, and the way that she has impacted upon your lives and touched your hearts. To me, she was simply my mum, and embodied everything which that is supposed to mean. She was safety, security, compassion, warmth, comfort and constant, limitless love. She was a friend – someone I could talk to and tell my secrets, who wouldn’t ever judge me but only ever cared about my happiness – and, unlike my sister, wouldn’t dob me in to me Dad at the drop of a hat..
She was fun. She took me to Glastonbury when I was 15 years old, danced with me, queued to get autographs for me, made new friends with me, fell asleep under the stars with me, and kept coming back in later years with her friend Kay and their Glasto Grannies banner, raving with my mates to Dizzee Rascal and drinking cider with us in the sunshine. She was someone who loved people – generous to all of my friends, ready to welcome them all into our home with open arms, always asking after them, taking an interest, talking with them, extending her love and warmth to them, seeing the good in the bunch of golden hearted teenage rabble I routinely dragged home with me. Everybody was her friend. When I was growing up in West Bridgford we couldn’t get 2 minutes down the street without her stopping for a chat with one neighbour or the other. I’m confident that she knew pretty much everyone within a 3 mile radius of our home, and what’s more she actually seemed to like them all. It could take half an hour to walk the 300 meters from our house to the co-op down the alley, as everybody we passed seemed to want to talk to her too.
She was hilarious, from the out of context Airplane puns and Short Circuit quotes to the bizarre way she pronounced the words deeJAY and carrierBAG, to her terrifying the neighbour’s kids when they jumped over the garden wall unannounced to retrieve a ball only to find mum, as usual, stark naked on the sunbed soaking up rays. She was a superbly fancy lady, throwing fab parties, never skimping on the decorations for any event or holiday, directing the junior amateur dramatic society in her spare time, and rather enjoying a glass or nine of fizz whenever there was an excuse.
She fixed a mean G&T, played a blinding hand of gin rummy, worshiped the sun, made good friends in whole other continents, sang the wrong words to all the songs on the radio, cooked up an absolute storm, gave the best, cosiest hugs in the world and was absolutely lovely, to everyone, all of the time, until the end. She doted on her husband, children and grandchildren, and was brilliant to her friends, and to my friends, and to complete strangers.
And she was quietly wise – one of the hardest things about what we’re going through now is that at every turn, at every dilemma and difficulty, our instinct is to turn to my mum for comfort and advice, to ask her how best to deal with the loss of a parent and how best to comfort those grieving. We can’t receive that comfort or advice, but I’m comforted by the fact that all of us feel the same way – we all feel the same loss, and all share beautiful, wonderful memories of my mum. I had always assumed that I loved her so much just because she was my mum, and I really didn’t realise until now that you all loved her just as much, because she wasn’t just my mum – she was actually the best.
Frederick Fulford.

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Tansin Fulford wrote

Mum was beautiful inside and out. Whenever I needed her she was there, she guided and comforted me through every argument with friends, every break up, every problem at work and every struggle with motherhood.
Mum was responsible for so many good times too. Memories from when I was a child include amazing birthday celebrations, garden parties, camping holidays, tasty food (tuna crisp Tuesdays drawing in friends and cousins on a weekly basis), smashing it in teddy bear picnic and fancy dress competitions and an amazing hand painted jungle mural in my room. She ran the drama group, performances ranging from Bugsy Malone where we sprayed the audience with silly string to an outdoor performance of A Midsummer Night's Dream for crying out loud! She even managed to throw rounders games at the Hook and a trip away into the mix.
As a teenager I was embarrassed by the half naked photos, nude painting and (when sunbathing) often naked mother! Despite her lack of clothes she continued to instigate good times. She took me to Glastonbury at the age of 13 and on a mother daughter trip abroad (I wish I could remember where!). She welcomed mine and Fred’s friends into her home and relished being involved in the fun, taking an interest in each friend and picking up our teenage language, ‘bad’ (followed by ‘that means good’) and ‘rinsing my credit’ were some favourites, but she could never quite get her head around ‘know what I'm sayin’ (‘but you didn't say anything, i did?!’). Mum also taught us her own mummy language- did you know if you need to know how to use something you have to read the destructions, hedgehogs are actually called hodgehegs and misled is pronounced mizzled...
As an adult our relationship became stronger and even more important to me. My mum always described me as a daddy's girl, but it was her that I would ring several times each week just to chat, who I turned to for guidance and support, who would text me silly jokes and who I gossiped and shopped with, well shopped with once a year on my birthday- she really did hate shopping!
Mum was so fantastic with Charlie and he loves his Grannie and Grandpa so much! The memories of the annual family holidays we have taken (a tradition I hope to continue) with Mum, Dad, Richard, Charlie, Svante and Fred among others will be cherished forever. Mum chasing the sun, swimming in lakes, sitting in beer gardens, singing her variations of ‘grandpa in my pocket’, always being last to bed, playing trivial pursuits, beating everyone at cards and drinking us all under the table! She cooked us fantastic meals in the evenings, made us picnics for lunches at lakesides or beaches and come to think of it catered for us most breakfast too! Pops you were right, she was the glue that stuck it all together! Mum was scared of going down slopes, miserable in shade and swelled up like balloon when stung by wasps- something that also seemed to happen annually getting worse each time bless her! Despite these things she would struggle on and brave it out to ensure everyone continued to have a happy holiday.
Last year mum took me and charlie on his first camping trip. She and charlie would sit outside the tent people watching, chatting nonsense, eavesdropping on the neighbours and playing cards until dark, something he too will remember forever.
My mum was my biggest fan and tried her best to convince me i was the most beautiful and talented girl in the world. She never judged me and made Richard feel so welcome, accepting him almost immediately into the family, trying desperately to cook something she thought he liked and putting up with (or entertaining...) his flirting!
As an adult my mum was my best friend, she was also her sister's best friend, and I'm sure many of her friends considered her their best friend too. If you asked her? My dad was her best friend, and this was clear to anyone who knew them. In the early days she was the more confident, sociable one. Pop’s tells of how she used to take him by the hand and lead him into new situations and experiences. In later life the roles reversed and it was my dad's turn to take her by the hand. Mum and dad danced together, sang together, did the Times crossword together and were a team, a united front through the good times and bad.
Mum was perfectly wonderful and as my dad would say just lovely. She was silly as heck, super cool and full to the brim with love and snuggles (snuggles especially with Charlie). I couldn't have wished for better and I will aspire to be the amazing mother and wonderful human being that she was.

As a side note - wide mouth frog jokes, lifts being wrong on so many levels, a great craic, swearing using her index finger,the ‘blue table’, easter egg hunts,sunny days at Trent Bridge and the best Christmases in all the land. Oh and definitely shoes and gin, and wine and shoes, and shoes and cider....

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Kate Ross donated £20 in memory of Ruth

Ruth, a beautiful lady with a brilliant family and lots of lovely friends. To me, an aspirational mother to a beautiful daughter Tansin - my dear friend who I will be forever thankful for!

Not long after meeting Ruth she once quietly reassured me, so very perceptively, that I should be more confident and more at one with the world; a memory which often pops into my mind during my less confident moments!

Ruth, with a lovely smile and lovely compliments , a very special lady, forever loved and treasured by many.

Love and best wishes to all,

Kate Ross xxx

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Kate Ross wrote

Kate.ross@live.com

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Offline donation: Mrs R Phillips donated in memory of Ruth
Offline donation: Mrs J Langdon donated in memory of Ruth
Graeme Ginn donated £20 in memory of Ruth

Ruth - I am sure you are up there smiling on us all.

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Graeme Ginn wrote

Ruth -I am sure you you are in a happy place smiling down on us all.

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Louise Gamble donated £40 in memory of Ruth
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Offline donation: Mrs Pamela Barlow donated in memory of Ruth
Offline donation: Pauline D Frimley donated in memory of Ruth
Offline donation: Mrs B D Allen donated in memory of Ruth
Offline donation: A F & Mrs K L Shepperson donated in memory of Ruth
Offline donation: Mr K A & Mrs D E James donated in memory of Ruth
Offline donation: Mr J D & Mrs J Collinson donated in memory of Ruth
Offline donation: Fiona Gustard donated in memory of Ruth
Offline donation: Andy Slapp & Julie Connor donated in memory of Ruth
Offline donation: Retiring Colection donated in memory of Ruth
Sue and Ashley Cooper donated £50 in memory of Ruth

With our deepest condolences to you all. Remembering Ruth with laughter and love, she was a splendid and vivacious lady.

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Mick and Sue Jackson donated £30 in memory of Ruth

Dear Ruth, such a beautiful friend, thank you for happy memories of the times we shared, we will always miss you xx

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